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Holiday greetings to you and yours! Where’s my gift?

Holiday greetings to you and yours! Where’s my gift?

I hope 2016 has been good to you. It began in a courtroom for me, which I think you’d agree, is no way to start a new year, especially if you’re the defendant. Fortunately, I wasn’t. It was still stressful though. I was already running late when I arrived at the courthouse for jury duty […]

HUMOR – Getting back into gear

HUMOR – Getting back into gear

You may not believe this, but I’m part of an elite group. Only about seven percent of Americans know how to drive a stick shift, and I happen to be one of them. If you aren’t and you want to be, you’ll have a tough time finding a vehicle to learn on, since only around […]

HUMOR – Remember, You’ve Always Been Forgetful

HUMOR – Remember, You’ve Always Been Forgetful

A lot of older people blame their age when they forget something. I think they’re forgetting how much they forgot when they were younger. If there’s one thing I remember, it’s that I’ve always been forgetful. And I blame it on the same thing I’ve always blamed it on: I don’t pay attention. It’s hard […]

Dreaming away the miles

Dreaming away the miles

I’d like you to meet my driver. Oops. Did I say my driver? I meant, I’d like you meet my husband. It’s an easy mistake; if we’re going anywhere, he’s almost always driving. And he’s very good at it. At least I think he is. I’m usually asleep when he’s driving, so I could be […]

HUMOR – Test anxiety at the eye doctor’s

HUMOR – Test anxiety at the eye doctor’s

Some people inherit money. Some people inherit land. I inherited glaucoma. Of all the ways I could have taken after my amazing mom, that’s the one I picked. Or rather, the one that picked me. The bad thing about having glaucoma—besides that it can make you blind—is that you have to go to the eye […]

100 Percent Chance of Rain

100 Percent Chance of Rain

There’s only one thing more likely to cause a torrential downpour than me washing my car and that’s me going camping. If you’re suffering from drought, just hire me to come pitch a tent on your property. I used to think it was the tent’s fault. My family used a variety of them over the […]

Traveling by stage

Traveling by stage

If you’re like me, and I always feel better if someone else is, the length of time you need to pack for a trip is just slightly less than the length of time you have available to do it in. You start out in the “I have all the time and room I need to […]

HUMOR- Lawns are dumb!

HUMOR- Lawns are dumb!

Lawns are dumb. They’re attractive but high maintenance, pretty but senseless—the bimbos of the natural world. As I’m hauling hoses around my lawn, I can’t help but wonder if there isn’t a better use of my time and water. And if it’s not the lawn that’s dumb. I like my lawn for about half a […]

HUMOR – Why I hate Facebook (and love it)

HUMOR – Why I hate Facebook (and love it)

Look at that. An acquaintance has just posted a dozen photos of her Hawaiian honeymoon on Facebook. Beautiful! Hey wait. She’s on what should be the best vacation of her life with the person she presumably loves more than anyone in the world, and she’s staring at her phone. I have half a mind to […]

Belly Be Gone

Belly Be Gone

You’re sitting on your couch watching NCIS reruns and eating a heaping bowl of rocky road when on comes a commercial. It shows a beautiful woman wearing an itsy, bitsy exercise outfit as she works out on the Belly Be Gone Exercise Machine. She’s not even sweating and she’s smiling like she mistook this for […]

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